Grief is defined as an intense, emotional response to a loss. This loss can occur at various times in our lives. We can lose a loved one to death, divorce or change of address. We can grieve for the loss of a pet or when we are diagnosed with a serious illness.

No two people grieve the same way, with the same intensity or for the same duration. Many things influence the way that we grieve. Our past experiences, from childhood on, have a great impact on how we are able to handle the loss in the present. Our relationship with the deceased impacts our grieving process. Also, the circumstances surrounding the death are extremely important in determining how we are going to come to an acceptance of the loss.

A person can postpone grief but they cannot avoid it. As other stresses come along, they become less able to cope if they have other unresolved grief. It is important that each of us deal with the feelings of loss and grief that we are experiencing.

It is essential to a grieving person that they have at least one person who will allow them to grieve. Some people can turn to a friend, member of the family, or minister or priest. Others find a support group that will assist and encourage them as they work through their grief.

Grieving is OK

It's OK to Grieve | The death of a loved one creates a pain that cannot be described. There is no scale that can measure the loss. There is a lot of hurt. It is OK to grieve.

It's OK to Cry | Tears release the flood of sorrow we fell while we grieve. Tears relieve the harsh force of hurting, and enables us to level off and continue with life. It's OK to cry.

It's OK to Heal | We do not need to "prove" we loved him or her. As the months pass by we are slowly able to move around with less outward grieving each day. We need not feel guilty for this is not an indication that we love less. It means that, although we don't like it, we are learning to accept death.It's a healthy sign of healing. It's OK to heal.

It's OK to Laugh | Laughter is not a sign of "less" grief. Laughter is not a sign of "less" love. It's a sign that many of our thoughts and memories are happy ones. It's a sign that we know our loved one would have us laugh again. It's OK to laugh.

We have several books and brochures dealing with grief at our funeral home, or visit the grief resources listed below.  Please feel free to contact us if you have any specific issues or concerns dealing with grief.

Web Resources

The Compassionate Friends | Grief following the death of a child of any age:
    http://www.compassionatefriends.org

Center For Loss and Life Transition | Understanding the complex set of emotions we call grief (Dr. Alan Wolfelt).
    http://www.centerforloss.com

Journey of Hearts | Offers resources dealing with many types of loss.
    http://www.journeyofhearts.org/jofh

The Grief Recovery Institute | An index of grief recovery articles.
    http://www.grief-recovery.com

American SIDS Institute | Resources dealing with Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.
    http://www.sids.org

Hospice Foundation of America | Education issues relating to care giving, terminal illness, loss and bereavement.
    http://www.hospicefoundation.org

Griefnet | Grief information, resources, newsletter, Kids Said area, and bookstore.
    http://rivendell.org

Survivors of Suicide | A site that helps those who have lost a loved one to suicide resolve their grief and pain in their own personal way.
    http://www.thewebpager.com/sos/