Grief is defined as an intense, emotional response to a
loss. This loss can occur at various times in our lives. We
can lose a loved one to death, divorce or change of address. We can
grieve for the loss of a pet or when we are diagnosed with a
serious illness.
| No two people grieve the same way, with the same intensity
or for the same duration. Many things influence the way that we
grieve. Our past experiences, from childhood on, have a great impact
on how we are able to handle the loss in the present. Our
relationship with the deceased impacts our grieving process. Also,
the circumstances surrounding the death are extremely important in
determining how we are going to come to an acceptance of the loss. |
|
A person can postpone grief but they cannot avoid
it. As other stresses come along, they become less able to cope if
they have other unresolved grief. It is important that each of us
deal with the feelings of loss and grief that we are experiencing.
It is essential to a grieving person that they have at least
one person who will allow them to grieve. Some
people can turn to a friend, member of the family, or minister or
priest. Others find a support group that will assist and encourage
them as they work through their grief.
Grieving is OK
It's OK to Grieve--The death of a loved one creates a pain
that cannot be described. There is no scale that can measure the
loss. There is a lot of hurt. It is OK to grieve.
It's OK to Cry--Tears release the flood of sorrow we fell
while we grieve. Tears relieve the harsh force of hurting, and
enables us to level off and continue with life. It's OK to cry.
It's OK to Heal--We do not need to "prove" we
loved him or her. As the months pass by we are slowly able to move
around with less outward grieving each day. We need not feel guilty for this is not an indication that we love less. It means that,
although we don't like it, we are learning to accept death. It's a
healthy sign of healing. It's OK to heal.
It's OK to Laugh--Laughter is not a sign of
"less" grief. Laughter is not a sign of "less"
love. It's a sign that many of our thoughts and memories are happy
ones. It's a sign that we know our loved one would have us laugh
again. It's OK to laugh.
 |
We have several books and brochures dealing with grief at
our funeral home, or visit the grief resources listed below. Please feel free to contact us if you have any specific issues
or concerns dealing with grief. |
Web Resources
The Compassionate Friends--Grief
following the death of a child of any age:
http://www.compassionatefriends.org
Center
For Loss and Life Transition--Understanding the complex set of emotions we
call grief (Dr. Alan Wolfelt).
http://www.centerforloss.com
Journey
of Hearts--Offers resources dealing with many types of loss.
http://www.journeyofhearts.org/jofh
The
Grief Recovery Institute--An index of grief recovery articles.
http://www.grief-recovery.com
American SIDS
Institute--Resources dealing with Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.
http://www.sids.org
Hospice
foundation of America--Education issues relating to care giving, terminal
illness, loss and bereavement.
http://www.hospicefoundation.org
Griefnet--Grief
information, resources, newsletter, Kids Said area, and bookstore.
http://rivendell.org
Survivors
of Suicide--A site that helps those who have lost a loved one to suicide
resolve their grief and pain in their own personal way.
http://www.thewebpager.com/sos/
